Well, today, we watched Park Avenue: Money, Power, & The American Dream; and God as my witness (once again), I wanted to flip some...tables. Documentaries always get to me! Yet, this time, I was more hesitant, because let's face it--- politics is literally a giant game where people use big words and shake hands, while either stabbing each other in the backs (metaphorically) and exchanging cash (most likely physically). It pissed me off, because though it definitely talked about the infamous 740 Park Avenue and those that call it home (or more likely "one of my apartments"), down Park Avenue across the river, thousands upon thousands of people struggle with poverty every day.
We went into politics and business, the systemic brokenness of America. Some of the things shocked me, like who funded the people I voted for (or didn't....I won't tell!) and how so many organization use iconic words like "freedom" and "prosperity" to define such outrageous and single-minded schemes! I wonder why things never get passed and action taken, oh right--- money talks...but in hushed whispers and through bought politicians. I have to say my mind was wiped and frankly, I felt dumb for not knowing...but also for letting my emotions run wild, because in fact this too was only showing one side of the problem and the problem is not a single thing. Politics is too complex...and unfortunately that's why I don't care.
I pray to change that. Which leads me to my next point: Atlas. Though it did make a brief presence in the documentary (through the novel "Atlas Shrugged"), I did not focus on it as much, because just as much as this movie had a point---it was also MADE to make certain point., Also, I should probably READ "Atlas Shrugged" before I go running my mouth on the Internet.
That being said, I wrote on my bottle today: "Am I stupid or is politics just complete poop?" And then after we visited the large bronze Atlas in Rockefeller Center, I wrote: "You are NOT Atlas. You never want to be."
I say that because what some don't understand is that Atlas's punishment was not holding up the world (or grand celestial bodies). The punishment was that he was eternally struggling with the weight of it, and therefore always on the verge of being crushed. This, of course, is Greek mythology (which I enjoy) but so many times I come into a problem or see a heartbreaking documentary and the world is put on my shoulders. I carry the burdens, expectations, and problems of the entire world--- as if I can carry it. That is not my job, That will never be my job. Jesus is not only the only One able to carry the weight of the world, He has already done so...so why am I struggling under this weight?
That is why at FEED 500 today, I went in with expectations and hopes to "save lives" and CHANGE THE WORLD, but God doesn't NEED me for that. He simply WANTS me to do that. He wants me to partner with Him, because: yes, I know God has great and grand plans for me. And yes, I want His will alone to be done--- but when His perfect plan is enacted, are we not working in a great and grand plan?
So, tonight--- I pray that I will never be Atlas. I can only struggle under the weight of every problem I want to fix, but God already has the whole world in His hand (He can hold it with even just one)! You are beautifully and fearfully and wonderfully made--- do not belittle yourself by putting aside humility and grace in an attempt to carry the world, only to be crushed by its weight.
Thanks & Night,
Princy
“Since I know its all for Christ’s good, I am quite content with my weaknesses and insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
| — | 2 Corinthians 12:10 |
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