Day 12/13

So, the boys are here-- talking theology, which is ironic because I feel like I am back at my church, or any meeting with brown men, silent and thinking: Why are you asking these questions when we already know the answer? Or better yet, why are you asking these questions when we clearly cannot fathom the answer? Also, I know these things, but every time I open my mouth, it is "irrelevant" and "common knowledge". 

Whatever, I'll get my PhD in Theology another day, but now...I can't get my thoughts..in order. 

Okay. I have vented/spoken my theological issues, so now to the grit and grind(?).

Day 9/10/11/12: Loving others is expensive. / Perfect God. Broken People.

So, on Wednesday, we went to a protest at Nintendo for the exploitation of people in the Congo as stated in Day 10/11. 
From there we went to the Harvest Center (partnering with The Bowery Mission: Mont Lawn City Camp), where we planned for PreCamp week! Anna and I are doing a skit! It will be mad awesome! 

It seems like ages has passed since Monday and Padre Plaza, playing with 3 kids, and so forth--- but time moves fast when you are working hard!

Anyways, the reason I chose "Loving others is expensive", is that as Jonnie (J-Wall) was talking about it, I realized: Whoa. I do that...

For example, last Saturday, besides Maria & Sean's Engagement, we went to volunteer with some high school kids in making a community garden. I kept complaining and saying it was hard, and then thought--- that's how exploitation happens! We are too lazy to do our own work and receive what we put out, so we force others to do it for us for little to nothing!  

How is it that we preach and say so much on the matter, but when it actually comes down to changing policies, learning facts, and making moves--- we are lazy and fearful: afraid to spend our money, time, and effort? 

I realize that is happening to me, and it is hurting both my relationship with God and my fellowship with my fellow interns! 
Will I need to cut out Arrested Development from my free time? Probably.
Should I wake up earlier so I can ACTUALLY talk with God instead of praying at Him? Would help.
Do I put in 110% rather than 86.75% into everything I do? Most definitely. 

And on that point, it is hard to think this---but God wants to use us! We are broken people with a Perfect God, and that frustrates me, because within an instant this world could be perfect without fear, anger, hatred--- but He would need to cut us out of the picture. All of us. That is unbelievable. 
It is as if God made a machine and each part is unique and irreplaceable--- but somehow this machine breaks down and instead of throwing it away or making a new one, He fixes each broken part. He oils it again and again. He decides that He already made something perfect and instead of moving on, He sticks it out--- even when we fail Him again and again, and logic tells US otherwise! 

But the problem is we are still broken because each part of us is not seamlessly churning and turning! Not every single part is playing its role or oiled up enough. Not every part is willing to work with others and comply to its making and design. 

So, what do we do? We stop rolling off our clogs and hiding under couches. We should stop turning the opposite direction than how we are supposed to move. We should stop taking the place of others or not working well with the whole dynamic. Let God find you, oil you, make you brand new--- so that He may put you in your place in His divine masterpiece, because once it finally works--- whoa, can you imagine how beautiful that will be? 


Goodnight & Goodbye,

Princy


P.S. I miss my firefighters...
P.S.S. I work that mustache...

Awks. 12 minutes late!